Never would I have imagined this being the highlight of my day. Such a simple thing that a year ago I wouldn't have had a second thought about doing but that has seemed almost impossible since moving back into my apartment.
Let me take a step back first to explain something. I live in a walk out basement so all the windows other than those in my living room, which is at the front, are a little smaller and higher than normal windows. So typical basement windows. The window in my kitchen is also directly above the sink so to reach it you also have the width of the counter to deal with. I'm only 5'5" so to reach and open this window I've always had to stand on a chair or kneel on the counter.
I realised a couple months ago, when I set of the smoke detector cooking something, that I couldn't reach the window to let some air in. The thought of climbing up onto a chair and balancing while I opened the window seemed like a very bad idea and a fairly impossible task at the time. As of that moment and with every burnt bagel or over cooked item since, I've been reminded that I can't open my kitchen window.
After 8 months on crutches, I'm not just better at walking around but my ability to balance standing still without the crutches has improved immensely. I've also started trusting myself and what I'm capable of doing a little more all the time. With the amazing weather we've been having and today potentially being the warmest it's been yet, I came home from physio and started by leaving my front door open to let some light and fresh air in. After a little while I decided it was so nice out that I had to open up the rest of the windows in my apartment.
I started with my bedroom. Although it was more of a challenge than it used to be, it wasn't terribly hard. I did have to stand on the corner of my bed and lean over my dresser but I got it open. Feeling pretty good about having opened that window, I walked into the kitchen. I did pause for a moment before I did anything. I'm afraid this probably sounds a little bit ridiculous but think of a time when you were about to attempt something physically difficult that seemed almost impossible, it could be anything, but that you were determined to accomplish. There was a quick pep talk going on in my head. "You can do this. You can definitely do this. Of course I can do this."
I pulled a chair out and positioned it by the counter. Then with just another second of hesitation to decide which side would be best to jump up from, I hopped up onto the chair with my left foot. I had to let go of my crutches at this point because standing on the chair they were obviously to short to be of any use. I rested them against the counter while I leaned over the sink and counter to open the window. Success! Now to get down. It didn't seem as safe to hop off the chair as it had been to hop on. Not to mention it would be backwards if I did. Instead I was able to squat down and sit on the chair and get off that way.
The moment I was back on my feet, crutches in hand, I realised how happy I was and kind of proud. I almost immediately started laughing at myself though. I wasn't oblivious to how unusual it was to be excited about opening a window. I wish accomplishing this wasn't such a big deal and that it was once again just another everyday task I'd do without thinking about. In all the times I've opened that window in the past, I never would have imagined it would make me so happy to do so one day.
A couple hours later when it started to cool off outside I had to do it all over again. I wasn't quite as excited because I already knew I could do it but I was still feeling pretty good about myself when I got it closed.
No comments:
Post a Comment